Moms this isn’t a list for you, but for those who are buying you gifts. Forward these to your adult children, husbands, boyfriends, partners or whomever else may be purchasing your Mother’s Day gifts.
So what gifts should you avoid? Well, many women (not this Mama) don’t like household items or appliances, so it’s best to avoid them unless you know for sure the recipient Mom is interested in such gifts. Jewelry and spa days are widely accepted among every mother I know, but keep an eye out for the unusual or unique gifts like the ones below:
1. The Slipper Genie. I love slippers, and I know I just said I don’t mind household appliances (by that I mean Margarita Makers or Blenders for my
fruit smoothies Strawberry Daiquiris), but don’t by the Mom’s in your life mops…or in this case any footwear that doubles as a mop. Go buy her some super soft, comfy slippers she can relax and kick back in, not ones to clean your floor.
2. Measuring Tape Belt. Most women would love new accessories. New shoes, scarves, purses, belts, etc. are usually a safe bet. However, most women (especially those who have grown and expelled baby humans from their bodies) prefer not to wear their measurements on their clothing. Any belt that will show the width of a woman’s waist should be avoided. Oh, and if this is a joke, I can almost guarantee she won’t find it funny.
3. The Cuchini. Have you ever tried to give a person hints through gifts? For example, my brother bought my Mom a waffle maker one year because he loves waffles and *hint, hint* he wanted her to cook waffles more. I’ve also bought a coat for my husband, even though he already had one, but it was because the one he was wearing was terrible. Something that’s beyond terrible, even if the Mom in your life needs it is the Cuchini. The Cuchini gets rid of camel toe (see photo below). Even if your favorite Mom wears bottoms that are too small, crotch cutting bathing suits, or tiny hot pants, don’t buy her the cuchini. It’s got to be one of the worst gifts ever.
4. The Wine Holder Necklace. “But Susan, you said jewelry!” This is not what I meant. I love wine and I love jewelry, but spilling wine is a sin in my book, and this is just absurd.
5. Facial Flex. Does your favorite Mom need and/or want plastic surgery? Does she have loose droopy skin? Although I would totally accept Botox as a Mother’s Day gift, you stand a good chance of insulting Mom by giving the gift of a face lift. Also avoid products that claim to workout facial muscles. She’ll still have saggy skin and she’ll look like an idiot.
6. Treadmills, Gym Memberships and Shake Weights. Even if the mother in your life complains that she needs to lose weight or get in shape, please do not buy her any kind of weight loss equipment, gym membership or get in shape quick product like the shake weight. It’s almost always a no, no.
7. Portable Speaker Shoes. Does the Mom in your life love music…and shoes? Well, look what I found over at Ladies Gadgets…no wait, don’t.
9. Rejuvinique Face Mask. Unless your Mom is a serial killer, perhaps your money would be better spent on buying her a facial.
10. This might belong with the exercise equipment, but it’s so ridiculous and I am personally familiar with this, so I gave it its own number. My Mom owned this workout VHS. She never would do the video around us, and I just hope to God we didn’t give it to her as a gift.
So go get that Mama you love some bling, a day at the spa, a gift certificate to her favorite store, but whatever you do, just be good to your Mothers and don’t get them anything on this list…
What’s the worst Mother’s Day gift you’ve ever given or received? Leave me a comment!