Fred is missing.
I knew exactly where he should have been, but when I arrived, he was gone.
How could he leave me at a time like this? I needed him!
What’s that? Who is Fred?
Oh, he’s our Elf on the Shelf, and I’m afraid he’s fallen victim to foul play.
I know it’s a little early to be pulling out the elf, but I was actually hoping to participate in the hilarious Elf Shamings that were started by Kim at Let Me Start by Saying Blog. She launched ElfShaming.com, and just like our fun with Mom Shaming, you can submit a picture, this time of Santa’s little helper, at his naughtiest.
My plans were foiled though when I went and recovered the Elf on the Shelf box which, upon opening, I discovered was missing Fred the elf. The book that accompanies Santa’s helper was still there, but box was total absent of any elves.
Last year I distinctly remembered placing the Elf and the book in the box, and I had no trouble finding the box which was also right where I had left it. Unfortunately, the box, although tucked away in the basement, was definitely reachable by small hands.
I went to question the
My oldest and youngest seemed perplexed.
The elf is missing?
My five year old smiled.
Jake will never be a poker player, it’s something even my Mom has said about him for a long time.
Happy, sad, scared, worried, excited, it’s all right there on his innocent little face.
His beaming grin made it difficult, but I wanted to give this sweet almond-eyed boy the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he was just smiling because he hates elves.
“Jake, have you seen the Elf on the Shelf? Did you move him somewhere?” I softly questioned.
Grinning, Jake happily replied, “No, no I haven’t. Gee. I sure do hope nothing bad happened to that elf.”
I don’t want to say the kid is guilty, but I do think he knows more than he’s letting on. I’m not taking the other two kids off the suspect list either, but Jake has tossed out a few more incriminating statements like:
“Mom, I remember everything that I ever did. I don’t remember getting rid of the elf. If I got rid of him, I would totally remember.”
He said, “got rid of him,” who mentioned that before? Not me. As far as I knew, Fred was simply “missing.”
We were on speaker phone with my parents, and my Mom suggesting places we could look for our missing elf. “How about you look in the shed?” As soon as my Mom finished talking Jake jumped towards the phone and said, “Yeah, yeah. I think he is probably dead!”
Okay, Tony Soprano, it’s like you’ve been waiting for someone else to suggest the elf was dead…and by the way, she said “Shed!”
So as I grapple with the fact that my Kindergartner may or may not have offed my elf, I’m working on a replacement…
Stay tuned – I think you’ll like him!
Also, we’re holding out hope that a search of Jake’s toy chest tomorrow might yield some clues. I’ll keep you posted.