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No Domestic Diva

Worst Cruise Director Ever

in Uncategorized on 10/06/13

It was just 7:28am on the first Monday of summer break when I heard those two words that made me cringe.

I’m bored!

I continued to sip my first cup of coffee, which we all know is the most critical cup of the day, just watching the rain hit the window as I processed those words.

I’m bored!

I marveled to myself at how many different roles we assume for our children – parent, teacher, nurse, cruise director.

I hated that last one.

I had some options, but it was still so early in the day that I was probably going to need to get creative.

Shit.

I wasn’t ready to lose them to the TV and video games yet, and the last time we played a board games I changed the name from Family Game Night to Let’s Start a Fight Night.

Then it hit me, if they were going to have me in charge of entertainment, before 8am no less, I was going to have it be entertaining for me as well.

That’s only fair, right?

So we started off with something to get us up and moving – The Harlem Shake – Family style.  Check out the video (it’s quick):

Unfortunately, although fun, that only took about 3 minutes to make including finding the outfits.

Time for something that would take a little longer – but what was a cure for summer vacation boredom on day #2?

I laughed to myself as I remembered once stumbling on a cure for boredom on the internet.

Dog eyebrows

We talked it over with our dog, but he wasn’t having it.  Plus there were three kids and only two eyebrows that needed to be drawn, so that seemed like an invitation for an argument.

Then I recalled seeing this viral wonder on humorist Paige Kellermen’s Facebook Wall (and then about a thousand others thereafter):

evil wizard baby(And before some of you, yeah you, get your panties in a bunch, that’s not marker on the baby’s face.  You can read about Abram aka “Evil Wizard Baby” here)

I thought of how much fun I’d have drawing evil mustaches on my kids, and maybe it was the picture of the dog, but it suddenly reminded me of my Mom Shaming.

You can read about Mom Shaming here, but the short of it was that my puppy chewed a red ink pad and stained his white fur pink back in the Fall.  I submitted his photo to Dog Shaming, but not before taking a turn and shaming myself too.

So sort of along those same lines I thought that I would draw evil mustaches on my kid’s faces, but before I did, I’d let them draw evil mustaches on me first.

That’s fair, right?

So I grabbed the same hypoallergenic eye pencil we used to draw whiskers on their faces at Halloween, and the kids got to work on me.

bored

Joey, who usually doesn’t participate in my antics, softly laughed and added, “You sort of have a mustache already.”

Thanks, kid, Brussel Sprouts for lunch it is!

Cecilia was much quieter than normal, concentrating on this seemingly once in a lifetime task.

bored 1

bored 2

Once she finished giving me some “freckles and brains on my forehead,” she happily handed over the pencil for her mustache to be drawn.

bored Collage

However, the boys both refused to participate even after they saw how totally awesome Cecilia and I looked.

That’s okay though, I wouldn’t force them to let me draw mustaches on their faces – I have photo editing software for that anyway.

joey and jake mustaches and more

The Double Standard Brothers at “Big Fish Grill”

Do you have any tricks for keeping kids busy? Leave me a comment and let me know.  I’m officially out of ideas and we still have 75 days left until school starts…but who’s counting?

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Comments

  1. anna says

    June 11, 2013 at 12:10 am

    This is awesome! All of it. I am so doing decorate mommy’s face for our activity tomorrow.

    My only good idea that keeps them busy is freezing little toys in blocks of ice. They will dig around for their frozen treasure for hours. Well, like 10 minutes. But that’s hours in kid-time, right?

    • Angie says

      June 11, 2013 at 7:27 am

      Haha I just read that as “freezing little boys in blocks of ice. They will dig around for hours.” I suppose that wold probably work to

  2. Sarah Almond says

    June 11, 2013 at 12:42 am

    You are the coolest mom on the face of this planet!!!

  3. how to make candles at home says

    June 11, 2013 at 2:07 am

    wow, inspiring… baby’s face make me happy, good picture

  4. Beth says

    June 11, 2013 at 9:24 am

    when my son was little, we bought a whole rainbow of eye pencils. We became tattoo artists. Dust them with a little powder so they don’t rub off as easily. Still, no rolling on the furniture or it DOES come off!

  5. Caitlin @ The Siren's Tale says

    June 11, 2013 at 10:02 am

    This is too funny… I can clearly remember saying how bored I was to my mother every single day of summer vacation. The poor thing! The Harlem Shake video is so funny! What a fun mom.

  6. Marci says

    June 11, 2013 at 11:38 am

    One of my boys is ONLY bored if he can’t go outside. The other is ALWAYS bored unless he has some sort of electronic gadget. The other one is a toddler and doesn’t get bored… he just causes trouble in his quest to rearrange my kitchen. Growing up as the second oldest of 6 kids, my mom rarely provided us with activities if we complained of being bored. She kicked us out the door to go find someone to play with. I’ve adopted the same technique with my kids. They’re much better at entertaining themselves than I would ever be. That said, allowing your kids to be “Free range” does mean you may have to suck it up and smile when they come in joyfully covered in mud or dripping wet cuz they’re testing the sprinklers at the park across the street or the fire hydrant on the corner.

  7. Stacey says

    June 11, 2013 at 11:54 am

    I don’t have kids, so I live vicariously through you. I love all the crazy things you do! When I need something to make me smile, you are my go-to. :o) July is fast approaching. You could do a Christmas in July type thing all month with the Toad in the Hole! Or make up a summer one that’s similar. Happy summer!

  8. Julie W says

    June 11, 2013 at 12:33 pm

    Kick ’em out is my philosophy too! And my 3 sound JUST like your 3 – my oldest is always OUT. Middle is always stuck to the TV/KindleFire/Computer/iPod. Little is happy to destroy something, or watch his man-opera, Chicago Fire.

    Thankfully, we have a summer sitter while I am at work all day. And yes, they all went home to the sitter yesterday (around 4 just before I got home) covered in grass clippings & dripping wet from a water war with the neighbor kids.

  9. MomChalant says

    June 11, 2013 at 4:25 pm

    Oh my GOSH! I am dying over your harlem shake video. That just made my whole day.

  10. Meredith says

    June 12, 2013 at 2:51 pm

    You are the best mom ever and I would totally hang out on your cruise ship–especially if you are offering up dance lessons. I’m in!

  11. BadParentingMoments (@BPMbadassmama) says

    June 12, 2013 at 6:42 pm

    You are the fun mom I always wanted to have and still want to be.

  12. Jeanni says

    June 12, 2013 at 9:42 pm

    How about ways to keep the 10 yr old in a full leg cast occupied? We decided to break a leg on her scooter the 1st week into vacation.

  13. Jenni Q says

    June 13, 2013 at 4:50 pm

    Maybe decorating rooms? Scrapbooking? My personal favorite was the time my TOTALLY RESPONSIBLE parents gave me the hedge clippers and told me I could trim the boxwoods and hollies in front of our house into whatever shape I wanted. I had a vendetta against the hollies since they had just tried to eat me a few weeks earlier so those babies were TOAST. I tried for a unicorn on one of the boxwoods. When my father came out 20 mins later, surveyed the mangled mess that had once been a fully functioning piece of greenery and gently asked me to bring him the clippers. He swears it looks like a cat got revenge on a poodle but I’m pretty sure that was code for “awesome”.

    So… yeah… maybe a watergun or balloon fight? Because being outside is awesome….

  14. Diane says

    June 14, 2013 at 9:10 am

    Just for the record, I think you’re the coolest cruise director . . . ever!
    Whenever my kids told me they were bored, I handed them the vacuum. Or a dust rag. Or the scrub brush and pail of hot, soapy water. It only ever happened once. Recently, my daughter, when her son told her he was bored said, “Never, ever say you’re bored. Never!” Then she handed him the vacuum. HeeHee. And so it goes . . .

  15. Jessica (@jessbwatson) says

    June 14, 2013 at 2:48 pm

    You are the best. If you do stuff this fun when they say they’re bored they are going to say it every day. Today we are outside fighting over the sprinkler and who sprayed who with water… sorry that’s all I’ve got.

  16. Coy Santos says

    June 16, 2013 at 8:29 am

    Draw a line and watch the dominoes line up and fall in a chain reaction! Domio draw is not the actual game of “dominoes” but a mini game that kids love to play, aligning dominoes and watching them fall. Have fun as you create intriguing domino patterns.

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