Gift Giving »

10 Horrible Gifts for the Holidays 2011 Edition

Posted by Domestic Diva at 11:04 am Uncategorized

Nov 242011

I can’t decide whether or not you all have a fabulous sense of humor, or you’re all a bunch of jerks giving shitty gifts for the holidays…

Either way, welcome to the 2nd annual Horrible Gifts for the Holidays!

If you’re new here, I suggest reading the back-story to this fabulously awful event, How One Pair of Men’s Extra-Large Underwear Started a Family Tradition. It’s funny how those stringy, blue man-panties were the seeds of a fun family tradition.

Anyway, onto the main event. If you’re looking to give the best-worst gift this year, want a gag gift that will surpass all others, I hope that you’ll consider the following:

1. The Ostrich Pillow. Have you ever had one of those days at work where you just wanted to stick your head, and possibly hands, into a sack and take a nap? Well, have I got the product for you! The Ostrich Pillow provides a cozy, dark, cushioney cave for your head and hands that fits right on your desk! It’s not conspicuous and provides the perfect portable retreat for that much needed mid-day siesta. Just don’t stay in there too long, I’m not completely certain it’s suitable for breathing.

2. Canned Unicorn Meat. Forget Spam! Get some canned meat with some Sparkle! For just 12.99 you can get 14oz of canned unicorn meat! That’s right this magical canned meat has crunchy horn bits in every bite! Made up of ground up wishes, dreams, smiles, magic and more, you’ll taste the enchantment in every bite. Perfect to dip or spread on sandwiches. You’ll be shitting sparkles and farting pink bubbles with this glittery meat. Seriously, I have no idea if this is edible, but I’m telling my kids it’s what I did to the Unicorn that shit on my dining room carpet in August.

3. Jersey Shore Christmas Tree Ornaments. Nothing puts me in the holiday spirit quite like The Jersey Shore. The poofy hair, spray tans, slutty clothes, and FIST PUMPS! Now, that’s what I’m talking about. HSN has this fabulous Jersey Shore 3-piece Ornament Set featuring The Situation, Snooki and DJ Pauly D ready to hang on your tree. Perfect, they say, for fans of the show, the soulless, and perfect for the person who has everything. All for just 24.95!

4. The Daddle. Traditional rocking horses are so boring! Thank goodness there’s the Daddle! That’s right, Dads (or Moms), get down on all fours and have some real fun with your kids. This saddle is soft, washable and a great way to interact with kids ages 2-6. All for just $55!

5. Clip on LED Lights for Glasses. Do you know someone who likes to work in the dark, has poor vision, and wouldn’t dare wear something as ridiculous as a head lamp? Well, why not try out the stylish and functional LED clip on Lights for Glasses! Super bright LED lights will really brighten someone’s holiday!

6. Essential Travel Reserve a Spot in Heaven Kit. Remember all the questions I had about The Rapture? What to wear? What to bring? Well, had I known for the low price of just $14.79 that I could reserve a spot in heaven, I wouldn’t have stressed at all. With your purchase you’ll receive an official Reserve-a-Spot-in-Heaven reservation certificate, an official Reserve-a-Spot-in-Heaven identification card, their informational guide to help you navigate your way (no GPS required here), and the best part about this product…it comes with a 100% money back guarantee if your reservation is not accepted! source.

7. Limited Edition Talking Honey Badger Dolls. Okay, I’m going to be honest, I love honey badger. I wish I could be more like honey badger, but I bet there are lots of people who wouldn’t appreciate such a terrible gift. Is that Lucy Lawless enjoying wine with hers? I have no idea where to buy a Limited Edition Talking Honey Badger Doll, but if it’s real somebody better buy me one!

8. Bacon Cologne. Now I love bacon as much as the next guy, probably more actually, but is this taking it too far? Well, I’ll leave that up to you. For just $36 you can smell like bacon grease all day.

9. Chum Buddy. Know someone who is terrified of sharks? Well, next to immersion therapy and getting them in a shark cage in the ocean, this is the best thing. The Chum Buddy sleeping bag/body pillow, available at Sears for the low, low price of $608 at the time of this post, can accommodate up to a five foot victim, I mean, sleeping person. Perfect also for scaring the hell out of young children.

10. The Japanese Snuggie. Giving the Chum Buddy a run for it’s money is the Japanese Snuggie. Forget the standard Snuggie…don’t even mention the newer Forever Lazy products, this bad boy takes the cake. The problem with those other products is that your arms get cold. This wearable sleeping bag will keep you warm and cozy to -20 degrees. Okay, I’m not sure if that last part is true, but this guy sure looks snug! Source.

So what do you think? Still need some more terrible gifts ideas? Go back and read my Terrible Gifts for the Holidays from 2010, or find terrible Gifts for Dad from my Father’s Day post, Awful Gifts for Mom from Mother’s Day, or Terrible Gifts for Babies for even more awful ideas.

Would you like to give or receive any of these gifts? Leave me a comment and let me know! If you need some real gift ideas for the Holidays, check out my nice gift guide too for some great ideas! Plus, check me out on Facebook where we’re giving away a new Huffy Kids Bike starting 11/25 through 12/13 plus a ton of other great prizes!

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Sometimes my crystal ball ain’t so crystal clear

Posted by Domestic Diva at 1:49 pm Uncategorized

Jan 022011

I hate being right all the time. Seriously, I do. I wish that some of my “predictions” would not come true, especially those about how I would be spending my holiday. The week before Christmas is when my first premonition came to me. I was standing with my three year old in his preschool class, when another little boy wandered in the room, visible sick and tired. One of the teachers asked him if he was “awake yet” and his mother replied “he was up all night coughing.” It took a lot of will power to not a) smack this idiot parent in the face and b) not to take Jake by the hand and just leave. Instead, I said goodbye to Jake, said a silent prayer for good health, and walked down the hallway towards the exit listening to the echoing sounds of what I would have diagnosised as whooping cough. Two and a half days later Jake started with a cold, cough & fever. Cecilia followed late the weekend before Christmas, and Joey started coughing a few days before Christmas.

Jake ended up breaking his fever over the weekend, but in an effort not to share what he had, we kept him home to recoup (which meant he missed his Christmas party & festivities). Cecilia also broke her fever the Monday before Christmas, and Joey who was still “well” attended school the week before Christmas which was just Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. I volunteered at school to help out all morning Monday & Tuesday during which several kids had to go home because they were still sick or had become sick. One child, who was puking all day Monday, returned, still sick and feverish Tuesday, was sent home before 10am and was back on Wednesday to spread his holiday cheer again. It’s cases like this, where the school’s policy is that the child must be fever free for 24 hours, that I think the school should be able to say, “Sorry! Take your sick kid home you horrible parent! We said 24 hours fever free! You think all these kids want to be puking on Christmas?!” Premonition #2 befell me Wednesday at Joey’s Christmas party as I observed him sitting in between two of the sick pukey kids from Monday & Tuesday trading & sharing snacks. Yum!

Christmas Eve we had no fevers (it had now been over a week after they started and only had mild-lingering cold symptoms), but as I packed my holiday diaper bag, I told my husband to take our spare trashcan and stick it in the back of the truck just in case someone needed it. As he was packing the food, presents, and kids, he mumbled something about me being a “weirdo” but still took the trashcan and placed it in the back of the truck anyway. My thought process here was that just two days before Joey was sharing snacks with his two barf-buddies, and we hadn’t quite cleared the “incubation” period.

As we pulled back in the driveway after a long but enjoyable Christmas Eve party, I was happy that my husband was right about me being such a “weirdo” and that the trashcan was still sitting in the trunk unused. Christmas morning was not quite as happy as I would have hoped, but after a late and exhausting evening, I assumed my cranky kids were just feeling the effects of the holiday.

Before we got back in the car that afternoon for another 40 mile trip (each way), Jake complained of a headache, so we gave him some Motrin and headed north. We had another fabulous party, and the gift exchanges were a hit again. Great food, good people, and did I mention the food? The kid’s palates are a little less refined and they enjoyed bowls of candies and seemingly unending cups of juice in combination with the excitement of so many gifts. Jake had been using his best “Oliver Twist/Puppy Dog Eyes” to get handfuls of M&M’s from various Aunts, Uncles & cousins, and after a sugar high, all the kids, including Jake, seemed to be finally winding down as we hit 157 miles of our 160 mile round trip Christmas 2010 bonanza. Expecting snow the next day, and with the car quiet, my husband pulled into a gas station about three miles from home just as Jake began to puke juice, M&M’s and Motrin all over himself.

Without a thought, he threw the car in park and ran and grabbed the trashcan from the back of the car that his weirdo-wife insisted on taking the night before just in time for me to jump in the back over the seat and catch “most” of what his body was rejecting into the can. It was moments like this, standing in someone else’s sick, facing backwards in the car, nearly home after the longest two days of my life, that I hated being right. My husband, the next day however, refused to admit I was right because he says I wanted the trashcan for the wrong kid and he was puking from 8lbs of candy and not from a virus. Give me a break! Sorry that my crystal ball ain’t so crystal clear. My mother’s intuition got most of it right…at least the important parts.

All the running around, excitement and junk took it’s toll on Jake though. After 9 days of a cold (which we’re told by doctor’s can last 7-14 days in kids), poor Jake developed a fever again and they advised me he had to be seen (in the snow storm) at a Urgent Care Center. After he and I spent four hours and what will undoubtedly be hundreds of dollars with the tests/X-Rays, Jake was diagnosed with walking pneumonia. The following day, just after the snow storm ended (and with 8″ of snow on the roads) Cecilia redeveloped a fever after 9 days of cold and earned herself her very first ear infection. My husband soon followed with an antibiotic, and Joey and I were the only two to come out un-medicated. So we spent the week battling secondary infections, running humidifiers, and finally were well for New Year’s Eve. I am now enjoying our third consecutive day of good health, before school starts back tomorrow. Anybody seen my bubble?

Hope you all had a Happy Holiday & Hope you all have a fabulous & happy New Year!

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The Joys of the Season

Posted by Domestic Diva at 12:45 pm Uncategorized

Dec 162010

There’s plenty to stress about this time of year, and for me taking my kids pictures in Christmas outfits for my annual holiday cards is not one of them. Every year I just take their pictures and put the best or the worst on my annual cards. It saves me the public embarrassment of miserable crying kids in the portrait studios, the absurd amount of money for bad pictures, the hours it takes to get ready/wait in line/and choose the expensive bad pictures, plus every time we go get our pictures taken the kids are sick three days later (croup, strep or something extra funky).

My kids are usually such a happy bunch, but there is one thing that seems to really piss them off. Holiday portraits. So this year, I hope you get nice pictures of your kids, and if you don’t, I hope you don’t stress. You can at least have something to make you kids feel bad when their older. May you all be filled with the joys of the season, cause we always are; here are some of the pictures that have graced our holiday cards in year’s past:

Joey and Jake Christmas 2007. Joey loves holding his baby brother.

You'll see this pose throughout the years. There must be something in the clothing that causes a lack of muscle control. Even Joey's Curious George dressed in Jake's sweater couldn't help him sit up.

Maybe if they sat separate and without the sweaters? Or not.

Maybe I can make my brother cry too. Merry Christmas 2007!

Christmas 2008. Let's try in front of the fireplace. Jake screamed without the binky & kicked off his shoes.

My favorite one of all.

At least Joey is happy this year...although he still hasn't fully regained muscle control.

Better luck next year....Christmas 2008

Okay, people! I'm done!

Well, at least no one is crying. Christmas 2009

*Sigh*

Nice try.

Jake getting his eyes poked again. No wonder he's squinting.

At least he's smiling....

This was the best of 2009

Here we go again 2010

Perfect Joey, hold that pose. At least it's what he normally looks like...

Jake is auditioning for the JcPenny catalog 2010

Here's the 17 month old lack of motor control. It's struck every kid at the same age. perhaps I should call the doctor

Looks familiar.

The best of this year....better luck in 2011, Mom.

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Rinse and Repeat

Posted by Domestic Diva at 4:19 pm Uncategorized

Dec 142010

I’m not a cuddler, I don’t like snuggling, and I need my own space in order to sleep. Some people prefer to be coddled and held not just at bed time, but also when they’re sick or not feeling well. Perhaps there was a time in my life when I was like this too, but in my mind, it’s been since I was a young child. When I’m injured, sick, or generally not feeling well, it’s best to leave me be. Even when I was in labor, I didn’t want to be held or comforted, I just wanted to do what I had to do to get it over with and make the pain go away. To be honest, I am surprised my husband didn’t find me off in a dark place like under our deck out back when the time came for me to deliver. I sort of have a sense why animals do it. If under our deck was air conditioned and had drugs for a pain-free delivery, I probably would have snuck off alone to give birth.

With that being said, I’m not a total frigid bitch and there are times when human touch makes me feel better. During times of sadness or stress (or even anger) having my hand held, back rubbed or hair stroked will help me calm down and bring me some solace…when I know the person comforting me anyway.

I didn’t even attempt to find or fight for a reasonable parking space at the mall today. I pulled my giant Suburban to the back of the lot, and stopped myself from cursing as I crossed the 6.2 miles through the cold and windy parking lot to the mall’s entrance. I told myself to remain calm as I made my way through the busy stores while being hit with shopping bags, stuck behind super slow mall walkers, and even when a mother hit the back of my ankle with a stroller while she chatted on her cell phone and paid no attention to where she was going.

As I stood in the longest department store line in history and waited as three people ahead of me filled out credit card applications, I silently sang Christmas songs in my head in an attempt to ignore my surroundings. This became particularly difficult because the old man behind me was standing a little too close for comfort, and was apparently stricken with tuberculosis or pertussis based on his thick, hacking, persistant cough.

Finally, after what felt like forever, I was on my way back to my car. As I made my way down the long mall corridor, I spied several people with coffee, and remembering the long journey and single digit wind chills that awaited me just outside, I decided to wait in just one more line.

Standing in the food court, I began to second guess my decision. Nearing lunch time, these holiday shoppers were hungry, rude, and growing in numbers. Again, I found myself in a line a dozen people deep and the “help” at the counter seemed moments away from quitting (not that I would have blamed them). People continued to cut through the line, and after the fourth person squeezed between me and the lady in front of me without an “Excuse or Pardon me” I felt my holiday cheer draining from my body. If not for the dull roar of the wind whipping outside, I would have left the line. I just hate the cold. “Just hold on, Susan. Just another few minutes of madness…” I told myself silently. I stood there with my teeth clenched, took a deep breath in, and closed my eyes.

Standing there I tried to calm myself and remember if ever there was a time to remain merry, this was it. Just as I was about to let it all go and find my happy place for a moment, I thought I felt the back of my hair move. Eyes now opened, I remained perfectly still. After thirty seconds, and not feeling any further movement, I relaxed a bit again and took a step forward as the line moved up.

There it was again. My hair definitely moved that time. This time I took my hand and brushed the back of my hair, too afraid of what I might find and subsequently say or do if I turned around. Before I could even process what was happening, because trust me when I tell you my mind was trying to come up with a plan of attack, I felt a whole hand (as in palm and five fingers) enter the back of my hair and what i can only describe as “swoosh” around then gently pull my hair as it exited again.

I spun around faster than the woman could put her hand back down by her side and loudly demanded to know what the hell she thought she was doing. The older woman, and by older I mean old enough to know better, stood there arm extended and mouth open but silent. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I demanded. “Is there a reason you are touching my head?” I loudly questioned. She stuttered a moment and said “I saw a piece of red fuzz stuck in your hair and I was only trying to get it out. Then I thought I messed up your hair so I just tried to fluff it up. I was only trying to help.”

Now there are very few times I have ever been speechless, and standing face to face with this stranger who was looking at me as if I were the crazy person, was one of them. Realizing we now had an audience and that the entire line plus two employees were now staring at me, I lowered my voice and said, “You must be off your meds or from another place where it’s acceptable to fondle a stranger’s head. If it wasn’t Christmas I would….” and I trailed off. I just stood there for a moment and looked at this stranger’s dumbfounded clueless face and stomped off coffeeless and feeling somewhat violated.

I hoped, as I made my way to the car, that anything gross from the woman’s foreign hands might be blown out by the time I reached my car. I mean, who the hell knows where’s else her hands have been if she’s willing to stick her hand into my afro (which I totally had thanks to the wind)…As I stood in the shower for the second time today, I just assumed that this is what I get for going to the mall during the holidays (remember what happened last time!), and then I rinsed and repeated.

One of my favorite Gary Larson cartoons

Can you relate? Ever been touched by a stranger? Are you a stranger who touches others? Leave me a comment! I’d love to hear from you!

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Terrible Gifts for the Holidays

Posted by Domestic Diva at 7:18 pm Uncategorized

Dec 012010

After an overwhelming response to the post, “How One Pair of Men’s Extra Large Thong Underwear Sparked a Holiday Tradition” I decided that since I had already selected my horrible gifts for this year’s exchanges that I will help you all out as well. I complied a list of terrible gifts which i came across this year in search of my own bad gift ideas. Keep in mind, these can be made even more awkward when given to a family member like Grandma or a coworker. Many of you, as in a surprising number, asked where I found Ramon. Unfortunately, I purchased him nearly seven years ago, and I am not willing to face the visual atrocities that befell me the last time I Googled “male blow up doll.” You’re all on your own if you want to explore that avenue.

So without further adieu, in no particular order, here are some terrible gifts for you to give loved ones this holiday:

The Companion Pillow

This pillow, which is fashioned in the shape of a man’s arm, brings new meaning to the word, ‘lonely.’ For the low, low price of $39.95 you can bring the feeling of comfort and a warm embrace to your solitary friends or family. Be sure to attach the phone number of a good therapist or perhaps a gift certificate to E-Harmony as well. It’s really the least you could do in the event that they might actually need or want this gift. Purchase here: http://www.hammacher.com/Product/79559?promo=search&cm_mmc=CJ-_-2513492-_-3197992-_-Special+Values+Homepage . You can also find another review of this product, some other crazy items like a 7K Chair that’s designed to make you feel like you’re on the ocean, and some great stuff too at One More Gadget: http://www.onemoregadget.com/need-a-friend-try-the-perfect-companion-pillow/

Betty Beauty Pubic Hair Dye

Imagine Grandma’s Delight or the sheer joy on a coworkers face when they unwrap their very own box of Betty Beauty’s Pubic Hair Dye. Whether you have a “blond” friend who needs a little help matching her curtain to her drapes (if you know what I’m saying), or if you think having hot pink pubes is, well, hot, then Betty Beauty Pubic Hair Dye is the gift for you. In case you want to stock up, or try a few colors, buy one box for $14.99 or pay $12.99 per box when you buy two or more here: http://bettybeauty.com/fun.php

Tattoo Sleeves

Does your man’s corporate day job leave you fantasizing about a tougher tatted man? Problem solved with the tattoo sleeves! Your man can sport his suit by day and these sexy tattoo sleeves by night,or maybe your Grandpa has always wanted to go a little wild. Really, who wouldn’t love this gift- and all for less than $20 (while the sale lasts!) Buy yours here: http://www.vampfangs.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=JPNSTT&click=3826

A Yodeling Pickle

Just when you thought yodeling couldn’t get any better, now there’s the new Yodeling Pickle. Press a button and yodel along, all for $15.25! This one is a real holiday steal! You can purchase yours here: http://www.amazon.com/Electronic-Yodelling-Green-Pickle-Gift/dp/B001948B1G

The Diva Cup

That yodeling pickle got me thinking about going “green,” so this next item shows your recipient that you love the environment just as much as you love them. And really, what doesn’t say love like a reusable cup you use during your period? I’d write more but I don’t want to spoil the details. Get your Diva Cups here: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001GQ7AAU/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_1?pf_rd_p=486539851&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=B000FAG6X0&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=19V9BT2YZG4MFRAQTE71

Knitting with Dog Hair (book)

This might be stating the obvious, but as the author of this book so frankly said, “Better a sweater from a dog you know and love than from a sheep you’ll never meet.” Enough said. Order your copy from amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Knitting-Dog-Hair-Better-Sweater/dp/0312152906

Kush Pillow for Boobs

I recently added pillows to my Holiday Shopping Guide which is filled with gifts people would actually love to get. This pillow is made for a very targeted audience: the large breasted side sleeper (women and men with moobs too). I myself am a bit chesty and would love to shove this swimming pool noodle between the girls before I went to bed. I mean, this will redefine sleeping for the big breasted side sleepers of the world! It be great at an office, family or friend gift exchange too. Order yours for just 24.95 : http://www.goldviolin.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=92711&Click=70922

White Stretch Bikini Jeans

These white bikini jeans would be a hit at the office party…talk about casual Fridays! Hot! Just do not pair with the Hot Pink Pubic Hair Dye. I’m sure it would show through and that would just be tacky. Order yours right from the designer: http://www.sannas.jp/main/en/pants-jeans/bikini-pants.html

Sauna Pants

Now believe it or not, these Sauna Inflatable weight loss pants are no longer mass produced. However, I did see several Ebay and Etsy listings with the pants. Gift the gift of good health to those you love this year.

Poo Trap

Perfect for people with dogs, and I bet if the recipient of this thoughtful gift didn’t have a dog already, they would run out and get one. Maybe the shameful act of picking up Dog poop was just too embarrassing for them before. Now, they can hold their head high as they walk their dog around town with a plastic bag adhered to its asshole. Who’s the master now? Order yours: http://pootrap.com/us/buynow//catalog/index.php?cPath=21&osCsid=2bc796bd6aa8e2255ba4dc2c6f8dd7c7

Happy Shopping!

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How one pair of men’s extra large thong underwear sparked a family tradition

Posted by Domestic Diva at 1:27 pm Uncategorized

Nov 202010

A number of years ago, my cousin, Joanna, attended a gift exchange at work with a group of rather demented coworkers. As she examined a table full of gifts, she believed she was making a safe choice by selecting a gift that was shaped like a DVD. Upon opening said gift, she actually found herself the proud new owner of a pair of men’s extra large thong underwear. Not wanting to keep such a wonderful treasure all to herself, she and her brother chose a random bag at our family Christmas party (which by the way is usually 30-35 people) and secretly dropped it inside. Needless to say, my Aunt Terry was quite surprised to be the recipient of such a gift from her godson (my brother), Michael. The thong then found its way in February out to my cousin, Bob at Stanford in California for his birthday, and back to Delaware that summer when Bob gave my husband and I a lovely housewarming gift (he even put the package inside a larger box with rocks in the bottom to throw us off-which worked by the way).

I ran into a snag with the men’s extra large thong underwear once in my possession, however. No, not because my husband wanted to wear them, but because my dogs ate the box. We found ourselves with a loose pair of men’s extra large thong underwear, so I devised a plan to get them back to my cousin for her 30th birthday.

No great idea is without some sort of sacrifice. I went through some unimaginable visual horrors after Googling ” male blow up doll” to find a male doll that was not anatomically correct, and who would be the perfect model for the underwear.

But after some eye washing, hypnotherapy, and perseverance, I found the perfect doll. So in the middle of Joanna’s 30th birthday party, she opened a giant box with a blow up doll, named Ramon, sporting the underwear. Sadly, Ramon only survived a few years, but don’t be sorrowful, he lived a full life. Joanna made sure to capture many of their adventures on film, and here’s one of her Christmas cards (which are highly anticipated each year by the way):

Joanna and Ramon with a mall Santa. Yes, she took him to the mall and had to ask Santa, in front of all the children, if she and her blow up doll could have a photo with him. Obviously, Santa has a sense of humor.

Even sadder, the thong underwear have fallen into the hands of someone not willing to re-gift (long story), but our family has recently started another holiday tradition in which many people can enjoy thoughtful, unique gifts. For decades we used to all pick a name for a Secret Santa at Thanksgiving and then exchange gifts at Christmas. Although it was a long and wonderful tradition, we tried something new last year. Each family member is to bring a wrapped gift with no tag, and each family member picks a number. We then each select a gift in order based on the number drawn. The next person can choose to select an unwrapped gift or steal a gift from one of the previous opened ones (oh, and a gift can only be stolen 3 times- the third person is the final owner). The higher the number, the better off you are going to be. We’ve done this for two years on my Dad’s side, and once last year on my Mom’s side of the family. I can honestly say that by the end of the gift exchange my sides are usually hurting from laughter. There is typically a pretty even split between “good” gifts and funny (awful) gifts. Here are some of last year’s treasures:

My brother gave the "holiday five pack" opened by my Uncle.

I found a lovely Shot-Gun Santa Doll which was actually stolen three times and ended up with my Brother.

Bob, secure in his manhood, proudly displays his new pink Snuggie.

My Dad wouldn't have to worry about his hands being cold with his new "Hander-pants" (aka underwear for your hands)

My cousn Amy, in her new hat, kisses her son, Steven, who is sporting the authentic Indian headdress I purchased.

Mom with another Snuggie. There were lots of Snuggies.

So as the Holiday shopping swings into full gear this week, I know many of you will be in search of the “perfect’ gift …and so will I. Our definitions of perfect may just be a little different. My family, on both sides, really puts the “Funk” in dysfunctional if you know what I mean, so I’ve never stood much chance of being “normal.” Maybe you can all help me out though…I need some terrible gift ideas. What’s the worst holiday gift you’ve ever received? Or do you have any different traditions? Do share! I’m really looking forward to this year’s gift exchange and cannot wait to see the treasures given this Christmas!

This post is in memory of Ramon. Photographed here as Joanna's date for my cousin Christine's wedding. We miss his especially around the holidays, but he is with us always. RIP Ramon 2003-2007.

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