I change my decorations seasonally, but I have the most Christmas decorations by far. It’s also my favorite time of year to decorate. Coincidentally, it’s my children’s favorite time of year to mess with my stuff.
I learned a long time ago, not long after my oldest child began walking, that if I had something nice, something that was worth keeping nice, it had better be out of reach. This keeps my stuff -and my sanity- intact.
I have a few pieces that are expensive and a couple others that have been passed down and carry a lot of sentimental value. Those items are visible but only behind locked cabinets. Maybe one day they’ll make it to a more prominent location, but for now, that’s where they are safest.
My kids love to help me decorate, and especially at Christmas, I let them help as much as they can. They also love to un-decorate, to move my decor around, oh, and they especially enjoy using my decorations to change up their play time. Their favorite toys, by far, are the play sets they have, but playing with the same castle/fort/hero’s hub day after day can get old. When that happens they like to incorporate the decorations into play time.
Here are just a few example of Christmas decorations turned play-things:
A scene from Toy Story 4? No one seems to hear me when I say, this is Mommy’s No-Touch Nativity Set.
Did I mention my kids have their own Nativity that my Aunt bought them from Hallmark? Well, they do, but there’s been some not so normal nativity nonsense afoot at the old stable. Baby Jesus seems to be in peril, but thank God Joseph is a good Dad and is battling the great white shark trying to eat the poor helpless Christ Child. Tigress from Kung Fu Panda has also put herself in harm’s way to protect our newborn savior, and someone called the cops. Not sure who’s side the robot is on, but it’s probably best to stay back and wait until law enforcement works this mess out.
I noticed that there was a huge gap in the front Christmas tree where several branches were pressed down. As I approached I heard a noise too. Squirrel?? No, someone had just placed a remote controlled tarantula in the middle of the tree. Given the height of the spider in the tree, I’m guessing this was one of the boys, but I’m not ruling out Cecilia throwing it in there either.
I’ve found things down in my hurricane glasses often enough that I always pick up the candles and look inside before lighting them. Sometimes it’s an army man or two, maybe a couple of crayons, or a Happy Meal toy, and not as obvious as the deep-sea shit our friend Diver Dan is in at the moment. A lit candle would be the least of this guy’s problems right now.
Nothing says, ‘Season’s Greetings’ or ‘Welcome’ like a live door wreath infested with Velociraptors.
Really, this year, I’m counting my seasonal blessings. With a new puppy and a 2, 4, and 6 year old we’ve only lost about four tree ornaments, the train for under the tree was broken, and one piece of a collectable house. A Christmas Miracle? Maybe…
What items, Holiday or otherwise, do your kids like to mess with constantly? Have you lost any household items to play? Leave me a comment!
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HAHAHAHAHAHA…I friggin love babies. 😉 Thank you sooo much for making my season bright!! 😉
This had me laughing my butt off – out loud – at work. My favorite has to be the cops outside the nativity.
I bought some glass decorations last year on clearance. They never even made it to the “decoration” part. My son broke them as soon as I got them out and turned my back for 0.5 seconds.
With 16 and 14 year old girls I miss peace and quiet. I miss my sanity. I remember a time when they were nice. Now they’re loud, obnoxious, snotty brats and I can’t even sell them on eBay because apparently it’s considered “Human Trafficking”.
Oh! And I’d like to be smart again. For one day even. According to them I know “NOTHING” about “ANYTHING”. I’ve been told that I’m only going to get stupider as they get older and that I haven’t hit the height of my stupidity yet.
Rent them out for, let’s say, simple cleaning or yard work or babysitting, then take a 15% cut as your management fee.
I’m laughing! Reminds me of the small toothbrush we found inside the VCR and the dinosaur inside the piano.
My parents’ nativity set still includes the circa 1980 plastic Yoda action figure. For the crèche.
Baby Jesus who?
Too funny! I particularly love the velociraptors in the wreath. My older daughter (now 10) has always been a “neat freak” and has always put her toys away when she was done with them. My younger daughter (now 5) is the one to get into things and play with everything. I wish I could think of some of the cute and/or funny examples now. I’m sure they’ll come to me in the middle of the night. 🙂
That made me laugh…. the saying that has been ‘handed down’ is: “Damn Kids!! Can’t have anything nice!” This phrase is used quite frequently when something ends up broken…. we find something hidden – that was broken…. and if I recall correctly it even came out one time when my mother was making spaghetti sauce & burned it…. “Damn Kids!! Can’t have anything nice!!”
That is so great! Your kids are very creative. It’s about the same around here though. The only difference is I only have one 2-year-old this Christmas, but I’m still impressed at how much she can get into. Our best have been baby Jesus from the nativity hanging out with the snowmen, Minnie and Mickey having tea with the gingerbread man and the bottom foot of the tree being rearranged (with non breakable ornaments) about three times a day. Christmas is a lot of fun. And my daughter definitely keeps me young (when she isn’t wearing me out).
My daughter (4) has this habit of trying to redecorate our tree by cramming several ornaments on one branch. I try to spread them out when she’s not looking, but a day or two later, I find several of them back on the same branch again. No clue what she’s thinking.
My kids (16,12,&8) are almost beyond rearranging everything. My son does like to leave behind additions to the decor like parking his Matchbox cars in front my Victorian light up houses – and the school bus. Don’t worry Tiny Tim, you don’t have to hobble on crutches anymore, you can catch the bus!
We have to watch our 17 month old like a hawk because he tends to EAT all the christmas ornaments he can get his hands on…his favorites tending to be the glass ball type. Needless to say the upper half of our tree looks great…the lower half not so much-its rather bare except for the lights! All other Christmas decorations are put well above reaching level as to avoid anyone eating them (although I have NO idea where the bell came from the other day???)…and below our tree is decorated with all of their other toys from their totes because there “has to be toys under the tree for Christmas” according to our 4 yr old. Thanks for the laugh & Merry Christmas!!!
Oh it’s so nice to hear that it’s not just my boys! Last year, we found 11 Hot Wheels cars in the tree when we took it down. And 3 more fell out when we threw it outside for the recyclers to pick up.
My Nativity is on top of the entertainment center. I learned my lesson with that particular pretty in 1995, when my cat decided to snuggle with the camel and wise men, which ended with a big hole in the cow’s flank, and a decapitated donkey, with some of the gifts missing corners and such. At least the blessed family is still intact!
We bought the boys their own Little People nativity years ago. They’ve added farm animals, dinosaurs, 4×4’s (because what if there’s mud or big mountains mom? The wise men can’t get there on CAMELS if there’s mud!) and various sticky substances that I refuse to think about. They still go after mine as soon as the box comes out of storage.
This is the first year that Little ‘get’ Christmas. And he adores the ornaments. He sneaks out of bed to lie under the tree, fondling the ornaments and re-organizing as pleases him. Yes, fondling, complete with two lovingly cupped hands and disturbing groping motions. It’s love fo sho.
Oh, and the stocking hooks. They are out to get Little. Seriously? Less than 5 minutes after I put them up, as I was wiring them to the banister rail, Little yanked on a stocking and sent a 4 pound chromed-out ‘L’ crashing into his temple. Ahh, the joys of boys, and Christmas.
HAHAHA! I laughed until I had tears running down my face! Poor Diver Dan! And the whole description on the kid’s nativity scene still has me rolling! Thank you so much for this post. I really needed a big belly laugh today!
My 2 (almost 3) yr old and 19 month old took EVERY ornament off the bottom half of our tree 2 days after we put it up. I came out of the bathroom and saw ornaments everywhere. I told them to put every one of them back on (knowing I’d have to rearrange them, but thought I better make them pick them up so they aren’t so quick to take them off again. Yeah…I’m new to this. After half an hr and numerous tantrums, they went in the front room and went to work…or so I thought. After some time passed and I couldn’t see the ornaments thru the doorway any longer I thanked them for picking them up. Then, went to check….they had simply “hidden” every ornament (as well as a 1 & 2 yr old can.) Needless to say, they’re boxed up until the presents go under the tree.
My 2 year old has been taking my ornaments off the tree, hugging them, telling them she loves them, and then puts them back. She has done this every night since we put the ornaments on. One evening I found her using my ornaments as ‘baseballs’ and throwing them across the living room and belly laughing. I honestly didnt even do any decorating this year because I knew what I would be up against. I love the toy story themed nativity though!!!
That’s like my house x3! Not that my son hasn’t done as much ‘decorating’ as all of yours put together…..I’m glad I’m not the only one!
I love it! It’s just like my house. The kids have their own nativity set, yet there are always a few dinosaurs watching over baby Jesus in the nice set.
Ok the raptors in the wreath is actually the most genius thing I’ve ever seen. I wish I had more dinosaur christmas decorations.
When my daughter was 4 she removed all of the clothes from her closet and hung them (hanger and all) from the Christmas tree. Whyyyy would anyone do that?
Love it! I’m just shaking my head and laughing because I know this is coming to me. My 3 year old likes to ‘help’ when mommy is busy with baby brother.
My solution? I have bells as ornaments. Have to be a ninja to touch my tree and not ring a bell!
I know it’s Feb., but I just saw this-i am a pregnant mom with a 2 & 4 yo. So that’s my excuse! My kids like to steal the nativity pieces and use them too! This year I found baby Jesus in a dump truck and Mary operating a crane. I also made the mistake of giving the boys pop-guns and then telling them they couldn’t shoot at anything ‘alive’ with them. I didn’t want them to become crazy psychos. So as I am standing in the kitchen one asked, “hey mom, can we shoot at the Christmas tree?” I thought- what harm could come from aiming at the tree?” So I said sure, little did I know they were literally standing 1 inch away from the tree, and to a 2 & 4 year old, shooting also involves waving your gun around wildly. At least there were less ornaments to put away!
I have just recently stumbled into your blog and i find it so hilarious! Your kids too!
I am big on christmas too, and I thought having a cat is the worst, until my now almost 3 year old son proved me wrong. last christmas, he managed to knock down the tree, nearly breaking some of my favorite ornaments in his attempt to redecorate it. he hates the pearl garland apparently, and needs to group together all the nowsman (snowman) in one branch. i cannot light a candle, not even if there is a power outage. a lit candle means its time to blow it out and clap for a job well done! now that the holidays are over, our house is stripped down to its bare minimum. he sometimes attempts to steal the crystal rooster and candy dish but we direct his attention to the wood carving we got on holiday, or the duck garden ornament instead.
Squirrel? Bahaha! This is too funny!
Oh, just wait until your 20 something’s mess with your decorations and put Mary and Joseph in sexual positions along with the animals or the people in the town of lighted houses and you don’t really notice until your mother in law is over. Fun times the holidays.
My little one (age 3) loves to pull the bells that are on the door down and put them in her room. She thinks they belong with the polar express book. She also can’t keep her hands off the Christmas tree ornaments. This year we wised up and just put mostly non-breakable ones at her level. She really loves glass ball ones.
I love this so much! Particularly the dinos in the wreath! Last year my son was so excited about the nativity scene that he would come down in the middle of the night to play with it, then go back to bed. Can you imagine the creepiness of seeing all the guys moved when you know where they were last night when you went to bed!
My boy made his own nativity scene with his plastic army guys and Doreamon toy set.